DAVID BECKHAM does NOT have a sock or any other padding down his pants in those Armani adverts. Previously we only had wife VICTORIA’S word for it – but now a fellow LA clubber has lifted the lid after sharing a loo with the England star. Australian DJ KYLE SANDILANDS told listeners to his show: “I was in the toilet at Villa nightclub in LA and there’s only two urinals in there, it’s very small. Somebody comes in behind me, and I hear a soft voice say ‘Hello, how are you?’ I turned around and think: ‘Holy shit! It’s David Beckham!’ I’m midway through and I think, I’ve got to slow this down. I couldn’t help myself, for the first time in my life, I glanced down to the left and had a look.” Asked whether Becks was a big boy, Kyle replied: “There’s two types of penis. There’s the one that’s the same size all the time and the other one changes in size. Let’s just say he looks like he’s got it going on whether it’s happy or not.”

Interesting bit of intel but … sorry, I still would need either A.) photographic evidence or B.) an in-person inspection to be totally convinced. It would be a tough job, but I think I could manage either option in order to be 100% sure. Yes?

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