Last night 3 of the lamest reality TV stars to ever disgrace television screens in this country met up and partied together at an event in NYC last night that was so epic in tragedy it almost sucked our plane of existence into oblivion. Here is a group shot of Angelina Jolie Pivarnick (who was ejected from the MTV series Jersey Shore after only 3 eps), Danielle Staub (who stars on the Bravo TV series The Real Housewives of New Jersey) and Dina Lohan (who starred on the E! series Living Lohan) nearly destroying our universe with their mere existence:
“Jersey Shore” star Angelina Pivarnick and “Real Housewives of New Jersey” vixen Danielle Staub crossed paths at a launch party at a Manhattan nightclub Tuesday night, possibly creating a temporal paradox so massive that it could have easily wiped out the Outer Boroughs, and possibly reality television programming altogether. What, you don’t remember that landmark time travel documentary, “Back to the Future, Part II”?
Doc Brown: “Great Scott! Jennifer could conceivably encounter her future self! The consequences of that could be disastrous!
Marty: Doc, what do you mean?
Doc Brown: I foresee two possibilities. One, coming face to face with herself 30 years older would put her into shock and she would simply pass out. Or two, the encounter could create a time paradox, the results of which could start a chain reaction that would unravel the very fabric of the space time continuum, and destroy the entire universe! Granted, that’s a worst-case scenario. The destruction might in fact be very localized, limited to our own galaxy.
Marty: Well, that’s a relief.
Pivarnick, Staub and Lindsay Lohan’s mom Dina Lohan, herself a reality show star, posed for a photo together. The agenda for the summit was not available, but we wouldn’t be surprised if breakout sessions included “Self-Tanner: Can One Ever Be Too Orange?” and “Legal Strategies for Sex Tape Participants.”
Ye gods … this is downright scary, y’all. Of all the reality TV “stars” that could’ve aligned in the same place, what are the chances that these dregs scraped from the bottom of the barrel happened to be in the same place at the same time. In all honestly, Danielle isn’t even all that tragic all by herself … but sandwiched between Angelina and Dina? The woman is DOOMED! Yeesh … the mere in-person sight of these 3 all together last night would’ve driven me screaming from the venue. Do try to NOT stare directly into their vapid eyes … you’re likely to turn to stone. EEP!
[Photo credit: Wireimage; Source]
Sasha Fierce is dead, y’all … Beyoncé killed her. In a new interview with Extra! this week, Beyoncé reveals that her alter-ego has ceased to exist since her I Am … World Tour has come to a close on the island nation of Trinidad & Tobago. It’s time to pour one out and say our goodbyes … Sasha Fierce is dunzo!
Beyoncé Knowles gave “Extra’s” AJ Calloway backstage access to her final, I Am… Sasha Fierce concert in Trinidad, where he caught all the raw moments, talked future babies and her plans for the next few months. “Sasha Fierce is done,” Beyoncé says of her alter ego. “I killed her.” Her Sasha persona will be no more now that she’s finished with her tour. The singer shared a list of things she now wants to accomplish during her break. She told AJ that she’s not going back to work until everything is checked off her list! Items on her to-do list include “learning to paint and cook, and to do Broadway shows and museums. And learn just to be at home and just watch television.” Beyoncé and rapper/producer hubby Jay-Z have been married for almost two years, and while there are no immediate plans for a baby, she does say, “Eventually. When it happens it happens… I definitely want a family. I’m too close to my mother, I have the best mother, you know. I can only hope the relationship I have with my mother, I can have with my kids whenever I decided to have them.” AJ asked if Jay-Z also wanted kids, to which Beyoncé replied, “You gotta ask Jay.”
I guess Beyoncé finally got tired of sharing the spotlight with Sasha so she had to kick girlfriend to the curb … actually, I bet it was more like B shoved Sasha down the stairs, picked up her broken body, loaded it into her car which she then set on fire and then drove off a cliff. Sasha Fierce got too big for her own good, y’all … Beyoncé ain’t gonna share the limelight anymore ;) As fierce as Sahsa Fierce really was, I’m glad she’s dunzo … the alter-ego thing is tired … be Beyoncé, that’s fab enough. Peace out, Sasha … you were fun while you lasted :D
Visionary fashion designer Alexander McQueen who passed away on February 11, tragically by his own hand, was memorialized and laid to rest at St. Paul’s Church in the Knightsbridge area of London, England earlier today. Family, friends, fashionistas, etc. all showed up to ensure McQueen was sent off in style … as well as to pay their final respects and to say their goodbyes to the late designer:
A private funeral service took place today for Alexander McQueen … The ceremony was an intimate affair, attended only by the award-winning designer’s family and closest friends including Kate Moss, Naomi Campbell and Stella McCartney. The fashion designer’s father Ronald was joined by his five children at the ceremony which comes two weeks after the 40-year-old’s death. Sam Taylor-Wood and boyfriend Aaron Johnson were also among the friends who gathered at Saint Paul’s Church in Knightsbridge to pay their respects, as well as heiress Daphne Guinness, who wore a dramatic cape from the designer’s autumn 2002 catwalk in tribute. It is expected a larger memorial service open to McQueen’s supporters will take place later this year, although no date or venue has been confirmed. ‘We are focusing right now on the Paris show, which takes place on March 9,’ a spokesman for the label said. An inquest heard last week how the 40-year-old hanged himself in the wardrobe of his London home. He was known from comments left on his Twitter page to have been distressed by the death of his mother, Joyce, and killed himself on the eve of her funeral. His sister Janet McQueen, from Hornchurch, who was among the mourners today, identified his body. Several members of the family arrived wearing the McQueen tartan, a feature of the designer’s memorable Highland Rape catwalk show in 2006.
And so … the hugely talented and very troubled artist is finally laid to rest. It is never easy to say goodbye to a loved one but I hope today’s ceremony was able to give his family and close friends the closure they most likely need right now. I truly hope that Lee McQueen is finally at rest right now. Farewell, McQueen!
[Photo credit: Splash News; Source]
Just as I suspected, last night’s rain drizzle did a great job of keeping me indoors … so I curled up with my Sandman graphic novels and managed to read my way thru many of them all last night:
While these beautiful hardbound copies of The Absolute Sandman and The Absolute Death sat on my bookshelf, I re-read my way thru my beloved dog-eared paperback graphic novel books. I should be done with the whole series (again) very soon and then I plan to read Absolute Death. I still have a lot of other reading to get thru (including this month’s selection for The Turtle Party: Book Club) but I’ve been in such a Neil Gaiman way these days. It’s very easy to want to say lost among the Endless:
I’m very happy to report that it is, once again, sunny and warm here in SoCal today … which means, I’m gonna get out there and soak up the sun! Hope it’s sunny and warm wherever you are!! WEE!
We are mere weeks away from the theatrical release of The Runaways and today we get to see the first TV commercial for the film that will be hitting the airwaves this week … here are a few caps:
This commercial is similar in theme to the movie trailer we saw in December but there are a couple new scenes from the movie to see. Check it out in full after the jump … More »
Posted under: 'The Runaways'
Yesterday we saw a HILARIOUS portrait of Jersey Shore star Paul Pauly D Delvecchio shot by famed photographer Terry Richardson and today we get to see a portrait of Pauly D‘s Jersey Shore castmate Mike The Situation Sorrentino also photographed by Richardson. Much like Pauly D‘s photo captured his true essence (which looks a lot like he stole said essence from Lisa Simpson), this portrait of The Situation seems to capture his true essence as well:
I mean … yes, The Situation is known for bearing his chest but shouldn’t the focus be more on his abs? HMMM. In any event, Richardson posed himself for a couple of photos with Mr. The Situation, which you can see after the jump. There is also a photo of Richardson with Pauly D behind the cut … More »
Jared Leto, who’s been showing off his new mohawk hair’do all over London, England this week (including at the Elle Style Awards where he ran into his My So-Called Life co-star Claire Danes), ventured out onto the cold streets of London last night to pick up a few snacky things at a local convenience store. As you can see in the following photos, Jared‘s mohawk had to be tamed for the outing:
I guess Jared can’t be expected to keep it up all the time … er, this mohawk, that is. I understand Jared‘s band, 30 Seconds to Mars, are playing a bunch of shows in Europe right now and will be bringing their tour back to the US later this year. We can’t be certain how long the mohawk will last but I hope it sticks around for a while. As I’ve said repeatedly, it’s a good look for him.
[Photo credit: Splash News]
Posted under: Jared Leto
Okay … now this is getting out of hand. Not only has Jesus Luz been able to parlay his relationship, whatever it may be, with Madonna to further his modeling and DJing careers but — apparently — he’s also been able to get a record deal as well. That’s right, a new report out today reveals that Jesus just signed a deal with Warner Bros. Records (Maddy‘s old record company) to release a debut single this Summer:
MADONNA’s toyboy JESUS LUZ has signed a record deal – and will release a single by the summer. I’d like to say he managed to secure the contract all on his own thanks to his amazing talents. But the almighty herself put in more than a word. The Queen Of Pop used all her might and muscle to get the model – who flaunted his own muscle on the beach in Rio de Janeiro yesterday – signed up by her former label Warners. The Brazilian’s first single We Came From Light will be issued in the first half of May. Protective Madge had to make some uncharacteristic concessions to secure its release. She rarely gives permission for any of her iconic back catalogue to be used in adverts. But in order to get execs to sign up her fella, she relented and classics Vogue and Like A Prayer have been licensed for a major advertising campaign Stateside. A source said: “Madonna was determined to give Jesus all the help she can. She holds a lot of sway at Warners, where she had a deal until very recently. But getting him on the books wasn’t completely plain-sailing. There was a little give and take between her and execs, but a compromise was eventually settled upon.” Jesus has a two-single deal, with the label allowed first refusal on an album as well. An initial version of the club track featured vocals from her Madgesty herself, but that’s unlikely to get a full release. It’s more likely to feature as a B-side or on a remix. Generous Madonna has also been covering all of Jesus’s expenses, including his hefty studio costs. And she been calling on other old pals, including legendary remixer VICTOR CALDERONE. The dance music heavyweight has had a long association with Madonna, retooling much of her back catalogue, such as Frozen and American Pie. And he’s been busy toying around with Jesus’s tracks. The source added: “Madonna really wants Jesus’s career to take off. She’s been going through her Filofax and putting him in contact with as many of her influential pals as she can. She’s worked with Victor for a very long time and he understands just what she likes. Having him rejig Jesus’s tracks will give them a cool cachet which is essential to building a clubland buzz.”
BWAHAHAHAHAHA!! I, for one, am VERY happy to hear this (hopefully true) news. I cannot WAIT to hear these “singles” from Jesus Luz. Oh, it’s not that I think they are going to be club-bangers … I’m fairly certain they are going to be tragic embarrassments. Lord … it’s bad enough that Madonna has been putting out her own bad music (let’s be honest, Hard Candy was not a spectacular album) but now she’s orchestrating the release of MORE bad music … from Jesus Luz?! OY!! Bring it on, Jesus. I’m dying to hear what you’ve got.
Posted under: Jesus Luz
Earlier this week we got our first look at the newest movie poster for the new remake of the 80′s classic horror film A Nightmare on Elm Street and today we get our first look at the final trailer to be released before the film opens in April. Here are a few screencaps from the just released trailer:
Twilight/Calvin Klein Underwear/PETA star Kellan Lutz is featured in this trailer and, I’m thinkin’ he ain’t gonna get outta this one alive. Last September, we got to see the first teaser trailer for Nightmare and, I’m happy to report, this trailer looks much better. Check it out in full after the jump … More »