Poor Jessica Simpson … the girl cannot seem to catch a break. The subtitle above is from a tweet she posted on her official Twitter profile yesterday from Uganda, Africa where she is currently suffering on holiday with her BFFs Cacee Cobb and Ken Paves. Actually, Jess isn’t really on holiday … she is on location to film segments for her new TV show The Price of Beauty (which has yet to find a distributor) but still — it appears that her misery continues. Considering the fact that she lost both her boyfriend (Dallas Cowboys quarterback Tony Romo) and her dog (Daisy Simpson) already this Summer, you’d think she’d want to travel to more luxurious locales to film her show. Well, at least she’s got her work to keep her company at night:

Jessica Simpson is moving on. Days after calling off the search for her dog Daisy who was snatched by a coyote last week, the star, 29, is in Uganda, Africa, filming more of her upcoming reality show, The Price of Beauty. “WTF?!?” she Twittered Wednesday after posting a photo of herself surrounded by protective fly nets. “Do I really have to sleep like this?” Simpson, who is in Africa with pals Ken Paves and Cacee Cobb, is “focusing on work” after the loss of her 5-year-old maltipoo, a source close to the star tells Usmagazine.com. “She’s so happy just seeing the world and opening her eyes to what’s out there,” another source tells Us. “This is a good project for her.” The star is also set to visit Mumbai, India, for the show, which does not yet have a premiere date.

Ugh … Jess always looks so … miserable. The pouty lip, the sad eyes … she really does seem to have the worst luck imaginable. True, her suffering in Africa is totally by her choice but still … considering the year she’s had thus far, it’d actually be nice to see her smile again. It is heartening that she, at least, has her work and her friends to rely on these days … how many knocks can one person take before they lose their shizz? I just hope this Price of Beauty TV show gets picked up and aired by some network … but, to be honest, considering her luck these days … well, I’m not really counting on it just yet.

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UGH! Shield thine eyes, Gossip Girl/Ed Westwick fans cuz I’ve got some really bad news for you. It turns out that Mr. Westwick decided to get some new ink added to his body and commissioned TWO new tattoos to be etched into his skin. First up, check out this horrid-looking tattoo of a bird feather (pigeon?) inked onto the back of his left arm:

I mean … wow. I don’t know WTF? got into him to think that this tattoo was a good idea but … yeah … there you have it. BUT, it gets worse. Ed got another fairly large-sized tattoo inked onto the front of his right arm … I suppose I should warn that it is technically NSFW but since it’s a tattoo, it’s not really that explicit. Curious? Check it out, after the jump …

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Lindsay Lohan, when she’s not babysitting for random strangers on the street, spends quite a bit of time hanging out at home and playing on her computer. Thanks to the wonderousness of Twitter, we are able to partake in some of her Internet shenanigans. Earlier this week, L. Lo professed her love for the HBO series True Blood and posted a couple of photos to her official Twitter account to show just how devoted a fan she truly is. Here are her pics and the texts of the accompanying tweets:

my dream ….. true blood is AMAZING

me& @jorgeperezjr & friends decided to pretend that we r the ECHELON of vamps :) hallow’s eve came early

I believe she meant to say that she and her friends are in the upper echelon of vamps, but you get the gist. While I completely believe that Lindsay is a big fan of the show, methinks that the posting of these photos might have another purpose. I seem to recall that Evan Rachel Wood mentioned in passing that she was a fan of True Blood and, wouldn’t you know it, she got a part on the show … something tells me that Lindsay is hoping the same thing will happen for her. I think a small part in True Blood would be great for her … she can’t do any worse than ERW (and let’s face it, ERW was pretty wretched as Vampire Queen What’sHerName) and we can see that she makes a pretty sexy looking vampire. What do y’all think … would Lindsay Lohan be a good fit on the show?

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Kylie Minogue is featured in the new issue of Black Book magazine this month wherein she talks, of course, about her upcoming first-ever North American tour set to kick off in Oakland, CA next month. Kylie’s accompanying 2-photo spread showcases her wonderfully chic style, including her penchant for wearing half-masks (like the one she sometime wears in concert). Behold, the Phantom of the Popera:

Kylie Minogue has nothing to prove. She’s the sweetheart of just about every nation in the world. Countless European tabloid covers have devoted serious headline space to her romance with Italian pin-up Andrés Velencoso, 10 years her junior. The mini-divinity has not one, but five fragrances. She was even honored with the prestigious Order of the British Empire and the French Order of Arts and Letters. So why, exactly, has Minogue’s career not taken off Stateside? Maybe it’s because she hasn’t toured in North America since first chugging along to “The Loco- Motion” in 1987. Even Neighbours, the TV soap opera that gave birth to her illustrious career, was broadcast almost exclusively for Australian and European audiences. But all that’s about to change as the gamine, 41-year-old entertainer from Down Under takes her spectacular live show this side of the pond for the first time ever. Through each endeavor and incarnation—from Charlene, the garage mechanic on Neighbours, to the early-’90s shiny bubblegum-pop princess and the moody soul-searcher alongside Nick Cave, to the breast cancer survivor and activist—Kylie stays Kylie. Both sexy and likeable, she is the diva-next-door.

Wee!! Love, love, love her … and this interview, while not too terribly enlightening, is very cute. I am so happy that she is getting press here in the US … first it was Instinct magazine and now Black Book. I actually found out about this Black Book interview by way of Kylie’s official Twitter account (she has recently joined Twitter and has been posting pretty regularly). After the jump, check out Kylie’s BB interview and check out a couple of her personal photos that she posted to her Twitter profile …

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Dannii Minogue, little sister to Kylie Minogue, has posted a few personal photos on her official blog of her and her new model boyfriend Kris Smith enjoying the sights of LA this Summer. Dannii and Kris, who are currently in Europe where Kris has been bizzy modeling these days, spent some time in SoCal recently and looked like they had a fun time lurvin’ all up on each other all the while. Here are a few of Dannii’s personal photos and the full accompanying text from her blog:

Hello Hollywood! I had a great trip to LA with my beautiful beau, Kris. It was his first visit, so a great chance to do the touristy things, and not feel a drop of guilt! My first tip is to take Hollyridge Trail to get the best tourist shots of the Hollywood sign! Then trek up Runyon Canyon Trail for some proper exercise, and views of Los Angeles … there are Palm trees to look at, and Rattle Snakes to look out for it seemed kind of timely to visit the Chinese Theatre to see the stars in the pavement and it’s always good to hunt for old favourites … don’t forget the shopping! and hot spots to eat … try the Octopus at Cecconi’s and everything at Palihouse! Palihouse do a proper English Sunday roast for anyone wanting some home cooking – the chef is British and you have to leave room for pudding! enjoy my little Mousketeers! dx

Get it, gurl! I have to say … Wow! Dannii has snagged herself a DAMN fine-lookin’ man. I am SO THRILLED to see Dannii looking so happy. I heard that these two were an item but this is the first time I’ve been able to see them together … hubba hubba! The make a very hot couple. I hope we get to see more of them. I’m also hoping Dannii (with or without Kris) will be back here in the US for Kylie’s upcoming concert dates. It would be so fab to see both Minogue sisters here on US soil :)

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Proud papa Ricky Martin, who became a father to a pair of twin boys via surrogate mother last August, is showing off his sons Matteo and Valentino on his official website. As you may recall, Ricky debuted his sons on the cover of People en Español last December and when last we saw him out and about with his sons, the family was out for a chilly winter stroll in NYC last January. Here is a new photo of Ricky, Matteo and Valentino posing for photographer Pablo Alfaro in the family’s latest portrait:

He used to live the “vida loca,” but life has slowed down considerably for Ricky Martin since welcoming his fraternal twins, Matteo and Valentino, by gestational surrogate last August. Sharing personal photos of himself enjoying the sun and surf with the boys on his Web site, Martin, 37, says that fatherhood “feels amazing.” “I’m so happy! Everything they do, from smiling to crying, feels like a blessing,” Martin says of his 1-year-old twins. “This has been the most spiritual moment in my life.”

He is SUCH a mom! His baby boys are so cute and already one year old … where does the time go. To be honest, with cute kids like these, I can totes understand why he’d be very happy and willing to show them off to the world wide web. After the jump, check out one more photo of Ricky and his twin baby boys …

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Samantha Burke, Jude Law’s babymama/actress/model who will give birth to his 4th child, has been sharing the progress of her baby bump online for sharing with the world cuz when you’re incubating the fetus of a world-famous actor, you apparently want to share that kind of thing with any and everyone. Here are a few snaps posted by Burke on her online photo album:

In school she was voted the girl with the best smile in the class. But at the moment, Samantha Burke’s grin is not the thing that stands out in her photographs. The model, who is carrying Jude Law’s fourth child, has posted a series of pictures of her baby bump on the internet. Scantily clad and voluptuous, with her belly swelling out in front, she is almost unrecognisable as the fresh-faced high school student [remembered by high school friends]. Old friends have told the Mail that Miss Burke, now 24, was always part of the ‘popular crowd’ at school in Pensacola, a seaside town in northwestern Florida. Nicknamed Sambo and Sammy B, she was one of the ‘bat girls’ who would follow the school baseball team everywhere. ‘She was really into sports and she would always come to the baseball games to support us,’ said one of the former members of the team, Johnny Ray Smith. ‘Those type of girls are into more athletic guys. They are also athletic so they kind of stuck together, going out, working out and playing sports.’ Miss Burke is said to have caught boys’ eyes and was awarded the prize for ‘best smile’ in 2003, her graduation year. One high school friend, Richard Wiggins, now 25, said it was ‘no surprise’ that she had broken into the world of modelling. ‘She was always really pretty in school. She was popular with all the guys. They were always talking about her,’ he said. ‘She was eventually going to do something with her looks.’ Before her modelling career took off, Miss Burke spent her weekends at the beach with friends and worked as a scantily-clad Hooters waitress. She quit the job after being signed by Florida-based agency Izon Models and began travelling to and from New York for work. She eventually made the city her home and began to take acting classes at the New York Studio for Film and Television. Miss Burke met Law, 36, while he was in the city filming Sherlock Holmes. They are understood to have spotted one another outside the 1OAK nightclub in the city’s Meatpacking district. They went for a meal at a nearby diner before going back to the actor’s room at the Greenwich Hotel.

… And the rest, as they say, is history. While Samantha may have had a thing for baseball players in high school, she really hit a grand slam by bedding and gettin’ knocked up with the scrawny (yet sexy) Brit boy from the UK. It may seem a bit unsavory for her to be posting her bump watch diary online but I can’t really say that I blame her. She really did hit the jackpot with this one tho … gettin’ pregs by Jude Law is the best thing that’s ever happened to her career.

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