Sarah Jessica Parker Gets Photoshopped To DEATH By ‘Harper’s Bazaar’ China

Y-I-K-E-S-!-!-!

Actress Sarah Jessica Parker is featured on the cover of the March issue of Harper’s Bazaar China and while that is reason enough for a celebrity to celebrate, I don’t think SJP is doing much celebrating in this instance. For some unknown reason, the folks at HB China decided to Photoshop the poor woman into a ghastly-looking alien creature. Click below to see the full size image and see what I mean. Can you recognize the SJP we know and love in the photo below?

Thanks to her Sex and the City days, people the world over recognise Sarah Jessica Parker. But that wasn’t quite the case for the actress on her latest magazine cover for Harper’s Bazaar China. The star appears to have been airbrushed within an inch of her life, leaving her looking like an entirely different person. The resulting image is rather startling as Sarah Jessica’s piercing blue eyes stare intensely into the camera. With her dark blonde tresses blown into big and bouncy curls, the 47-year-old poses in a colourful pretty printed dress which features a black lace top and matching bra underneath. Sarah Jessica accessorises with ornate drop earrings and a delicate ring, but all eyes are on the star’s fierce-looking face.

See, I love me some SJP … and I think those Harper’s Bazaar folks really did her wrong. I know that she gets picked on a lot by haters but I don’t think even her most vile detractors would do something this dastardly to her. Poor thing. As much as this photo terrifies me, I find that I cannot look away. I stare into her slitted eyes and … I lose ……………. all sense ………………….. of time.

Ugh, gotta snap out of it.

Could this be a nefarious plot by the Chinese government to exact some sort of revenge against the US for the production of the heinous sequel film Sex and the City 2? Um, I’m thinkin’ yes. Yikes!

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  1. Yikes. I’m sorry but if I ran into her looking like that at night in a dark alley I would run like the dickens! Heck, it could be broad daylight at Jewel-Osco near the produce and I would still run my little gay ass off.

  2. Jim C

    She is looking like a straight up Bride of Voldemort. Poor thing.

  3. Sam

    I feel like she’s in costume for Hocus Pocus 2 or something…

  4. Martha

    I wonder if all the blame falls on photoshop’s doorstep or if it partly resides on SJP’s inability to give up smoking. It ages you, and then crazy drastic steps have to be taken to make you cover-ready.

  5. miguel

    WHOA…they photoshopped her to look like a scary ass looking drag queen.

  6. Hurry up and post a few more things so this will drop off the front page. Those eyes. Every time I scroll down and see them, I get sudden visions of my soul being ripped out through my nose with meat hooks Puppies! Kittens! Butterflies!Cotton Candy! Hurry!

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