PITNB Pinkies: The 2013 Grammy Awards Edition

Because We Need To Discuss Jack White's Performance, Among Other Things.

Last night, the 2013 Grammy Awards definitely did it up big. We’ve already checked out the winners and the fashionistas from the show, and I had to show some lurve to Rihanna, because her performance was definitely one of my faves. Now it’s time to recap all of the amazing madness that went down on the biggest night in music! It’s been awhile since we last gave out some PITNB Pinkie Awards, so click inside to re-live and re-lurve the best of the 55th annual Grammy Awards!

 

The PITNB Pinkie Awards for The 2013 Grammys

The Award: Most Likely To Further Prove My Point That Kelly Rowland Is A God Among Men
The Winner: Um. Kelly Rowland, God Among Men.


 

The Award: Most Gangsta Performance For A Non-Gangsta Song
The Winner: fun., for legit performing in the rain. I mean, I guess it was faux rain, but that ish was still gangsta.
 


Fun – Carry On – Grammys 2013 by IdolxMuzic

 

The Award: Shortest Performer, Probably Since Prince, To Cause Many Various Proverbial Panties To Be Thrown At The TV Screen
Winner: Miguel, for being all short and sexy and performing the shortest, sexiest rendition of Adorn (for which he won the Grammy for Best R&B Song)
 


Miguel Adorn Live at the 2013 grammy's by f1533382024

 
The Award: Happiest Babydaddy At The Grammys
The Winner: Wiz Khalifa. Okay, did you see him in that performance with Miguel? LOL, I’m not even a big Wiz fan, but he just looked so psyched to be there! Shouts-out to Amber, who’s been prego for almost a year now.

 
The AwardMost Likely To Treat Grammy Night Like It Was His Little Cousin’s High School Graduation Or Something ‘Cause He’s Been Gettin’ Grammys And He’s Just Showing Up To Make All The Young Folk Feel Good
The Winner: Jay-Z, who legit was sippin’ on cognac the entire night (except for when he performed with JT… maybe), and had me rooollllliiiinnnnn’ when the dude from fun. thanked him for their award. Please, wait until the end of the video to hear Hova‘s response. Okay, and in case you can’t watch right now, you need to understand that Jay-Z shouted ‘You’re Welcome‘ as if he seriously believed that he seriously should be thanked for fun.‘s big win. I love it. I love him.
 


Fun thanks Jay-Z and Taylor Swift 2013 Grammys by dm_5118ea58b33d8

 

The Award: Only Person Cool Enough To Get Jay-Z To Put Down His Glass Of Cognac For Like Two Seconds
The Winner: Justin Timberlake, who is totally, officially, back.
 


Video Justin Timberlake feat Jay-Z performs… by dm_5118ca9ddce82

 

But Wait! There are more Pinkie Awards on the next page!
 

 
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  1. Joanna

    I thought the best performance of the night was a toss up between the Bob Marley tribute and FUN. But what I really liked was Sing jamming with Bruno Mars on “Locked Out of Heaven.” I have always thought that song sounded like a Police song and apparently Sting did too. The song only got better once he joined in.

    On a side note, I thought Carrie Underwood’s designs that were projected onto her dress were absolutely beautiful. On the other hand, I was talking to my sister about it and she said not only did she and my parents hate the whole thing, but my father thought the first blue design she projected onto her dress looked a bit like a pair of Fallopian Tubes ;)

    • Joanna, ‘my father thought the first blue design she projected onto her dress looked a bit like a pair of Fallopian Tubes’ LMAO! Oh, man. I was torn for like, 5 minutes over that set. I couldn’t tell if it was really beautiful or really ridiculous. But in the end I decided that I liked it; it was different, some of the patterns were really beautiful, and I was blown away (lol) by her voice.

  2. muchacha

    Props to Frank Ocean for singing Forrest Gump!

    Also, thanks for posting the videos Shannon – great recap of the show.

  3. LOL a shout out during the Pinkies? amazing. but shockingly..i wasnt a huge fan of Frank’s performance.i mean i liked it and i get what he was going for (and of course Forrest Gump is always a winner) i find Frank is so much effective when he;s sitting with his mic. but for a first time grammy performance..it was good.

    JT was great, loved it. but i think Bruno Mars & the Bob Marley tribute won the night. Ziggy & Damian are my homeboys.

    • nicole, you know, I can kinda see how you wouldn’t be in love with the performance. I think it’s even harder when you really like a song, ya know? It’s gonna be interesting to see how his style evolves over time.

    • i hope he gives himself a chance to evolve. the last thing he said about his music (that i read) was Orange Channel could very well be his last album..but i just dont believe it.

  4. I love Jay and you’re right on the cognac and the ridiculous fun. acceptance speech interaction…but you missed my favorite HOV moment of the night (and actually my favorite moment, I think).

    Jay-Z was up to accept the award for best rap/sung collaboration and he just stands back, letting everyone else do their thing. Then, at the very end he leans over and says:

    “And I’d like to thank the swap meet for his hat!” Referring to The-Dream. Amazing.

    • Erica Croce, lmao! I dislike The-Dream so much, I almost missed that moment. Apparently he came out and said it was all good, and that Bey actually wanted both hats, lmao. He’s so ridic… with such awesome music.

      But it WAS a great moment for Jay. He’s so effing famed out, he doesn’t even bother doing Thank You’s. He just makes mini diss records and bounces, lmao! HOV!

  5. The highlights for me were Jay-Z’s “You’re welcome!” (hilarious!) and Bob Marley’s tribute. I was entranced with the perfection that is Bruno Mars and the Hooligans, and then out comes Sting and I lost my cool. That was awesome. And then Rhianna and Damian joined and I lost whatever remained of my Caribbean cool.

    Also, Taylor Swift was hilarious throughout the night. Her fangirling-induced dancing is one of the most awkward things I have ever seen in my life. It reached its peak when she fiercely attempted her hand at reggae dancing. Um, just say no, Taylor. Just say no.

  6. Aww yayayay! This was a great review, then I almost fell of the chair when I saw my shout out, lol. LOVE Shannon
    ,

    Mr. Carter was tipsy. Between him and Bayonne taking silly pics (She was trying to ‘sneak ‘ a Grammy and him drinking Cognac out of it.) I was doneeee

    I just want to be Kelly Carson’s best friend. She was lit but in the best possible way LOL. Now that I think of it, all the Kelly’s (Clarkson, Osborne, and Rowland) were amazing.

  7. Kelly C. had me rollin last night. GIrlfriend was not feeling any pain. And the shouts-out to Miguel was SO funny. I was like OMG. She definitely got the Cinderella face from me.

  8. Gillian

    I hope the beibs was taking notes while JT was on stage. He is going to have to step it up, lose the saggy crotch pants, high tops and stop crying about not getting a Grammy nom if he has any chance of being relevant in music this year. Ps Beyonce- notice how EVERYONE loves Jay-Z? How could you NOT use him in the Super Bowl? If JT can get him on stage why couldn’t you? Such a waste… Pps Queen Bey, what were you thinking with the pant suit? You should hire Kelly Roland’s stylist stat!

  9. One of my favorite moments from last night was when J.Lo was walking up to present, the cameras went to Drake and as soon as they did you see Drake say “DAYUM” lol loved it!

    Ok, I am going to be a Rihanna hater right now. Her performance was ok, and I am only saying that because she showed up with the douche of the century, Chris Brown. Was I the only one that hated when the cameras kept showing them? Ugh. Ok, I am done now.

  10. Kiki

    Can we talk about how Jack White has now morphed into Mary Louise Parker when she was in “Fried Green Tomatoes”???

    http://www.movpins.com/big/MV5BNjI3MjU4NDkwNF5BMl5BanBnXkFtZTcwODM1NDgwMw/still-of-mary-louise-parker-and-cicely-tyson-in-fried-green-tomatoes.jpg

  11. OMG that comment about Wiz and Amber Rose!!! HILAR! For reals about that baby though, I’ve BEEN waiting. Can’t wait to see that little boy Rosebud!

  12. Lindsay

    i. am. OBSESSED. with Bruno Mars’ BAND! First saw them on SNL and must have watched the clip 50 times. I love dancing musicians! So much fun!

    Justin Timberlake absolutely killed it! So many people I know are Anti-Suit&Tie…but I’m loving it. Everyone was expecting something as huge as “Sexyback” – but lightning doesn’t strike twice! I totally see big things from him tho. He is, afterall, Mr. JT. (nowwatchagotforme)

    Loved everything about Kelly Clarkson! And Adele is an absolute crack up!

    Now just waiting for Fashion Police to see all of the outfits I may have missed!

  13. Now, I didn’t watch the Grammys (I know – who am I?) but I seriously laughed at the award title of: Shortest Performer, Probably Since Prince, To Cause Many Various Proverbial Panties To Be Thrown At The TV Screen. I watched the video, and yes… That is entirely accurate! I did also catch my boo, Ed Sheeran, perform. My god, his music is so beautiful. I just want him!

  14. Jen

    First, JT is so dern sexy, it doesn’t even matter that he sounds like the 4th bee gee. Second, an award needs to go to Katy perry’s ample bosoms, for making us small girls jealous. Third, we just need to start losing all of Chris Brown’s invitations in the mail. Ain’t nobody wanna see his ugly face!

    • Karen

      That’s it!! The 4th Bee Gee! I couldn’t put my finger on it, but that is it. Thank you!

      Have to admit that I did not like it though. I kinda felt like laughing the whole time he was being a Bee Gee. Which should have told me something — I have some Bee Gee’s on my iPod *because* they crack me up! It’s like musical comic relief.

  15. Kelly Clarkson and Kelly Clarkson and Kelly Clarkson with a little JT on the side. I am not Taylor Swift’s audience, although I do think she is pretty, and always elegantly dressed, coiffed and made up. Her stage presence has really grown and she is a now strong professional and is no longer the shy, simpering young girl who constantly puts her hand over her mouth. I’m past trying to guess who her broken love songs are about. There are just so many possibilities that the value is just another day, another dollar.

  16. Lauren xx

    Wiz looks thrilled with life but DAMN Amber Rose has got that new momma glow, this is the most gorgeous I’ve ever seen her! They look so genuinely filled with joy, makes me smile.

  17. First can I say, whoever sang with Jack White, her makeup was absolutely superb! It was the right colors for her complexion and blended to perfection…

    Rhi Rhi was my favorite performance of the night. and Kelly was the highlight of the night. She’s a fun drunk, but even drunk she kilt those ballads.

    And Shannon, get your boy Frank… highly anticipated mediocre grammy debuts are not okay…

  18. Shannon

    Jack white? It looked like Sweeney Todd and Phaedra from RHOA!

  19. I agree, that Bruno Mars performance/ Bob Marley tribute was awesome and underrated. They had everyone dancing and Bruno’s band is top-notch. I missed the Black Keys but I know they’re already great live as well.

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