Folks, it’s time for another PITNB Pinkie Awards and I’m sooo excited for today’s winners! Last night the 2012 MTV Video Music Awards went down and, as usual, all kinds of madness ensued. Before the show, I wrote about some of the things I was most excited about and though there were many disappointments (Kevin Hart = FAIL), the event was still totally fun. Celebs were kissing, dissing, stage-diving, and getting pregnant (okay, showing up already pregnant, but still); it was awesome. We’ll start with the first award, for Most Controversial Kiss That Barely Qualifies As A Kiss But Was Still A HUGE Deal. Rihanna and Chris Brown’s kiss heard ’round the world seemed to happen off-camera, but in this world we all know there’s no such thing as ‘off-camera’! MTV caught the two in the act after Rihanna accepted the coveted Video Of The Year award. Peep the video and I suggest watching it in full screen. Oh, and don’t blink! It’s a short kiss, but it’s a kiss alright! Your thoughts??? We’ve got more winners (i.e. Rebel Wilson, Katy Perry, Frank Ocean, and P!nk) inside!
The Award: Absolute Best Dressed Of All Time
The Winner: Rebel Wilson, whose presentation with The Wanted was easily the best moment of the night.
The Award: Most Likely To Make You Wish He’d Seriously Consider Changing His Sexuality But Oh Yeah You Can’t Change It But Then You Remember That He Didn’t Exactly Come Out As ‘Gay’ So Maybe He Is Bi-Sexual After All And Therefore Wouldn’t Mind If You Threw Your Proverbial Panties On The Stage
The Winner: Frank Ocean, for giving the– hands down– best performance of the night. I was amazed (and, apparently… slightly aroused) when he took the stage and sounded exactly like he sounds on his record, while giving a live performance. Insane! I asked the love of my life if it would be weird if I threw my panties at the screen; he said Frank would, most likely, just throw them back at me. Touché.
The Award: Most Likely To Embrace The Profound Message Of R. Kelly’s ‘Feelin On Yo Booty’ Single While Performing On Stage With Rihanna
The Winner: A$AP Rocky, who made his first VMA appearance and opened the show with RiRi! It was awesome! And yeah, then he grabbed her butt. He was just happy to be there, lmao. If you don’t wanna watch the whole performance, Complex has a hilarious GIF of it here.
The Award: Most Likely To Have You All Like, ‘Why Haven’t I Been To A P!nk Concert Before?’
The Winner: P!nk (obvi), for giving one of the few great performances of the night. She may have pulled out some old moves, but we needed to see that ish again, lol! Loved it!
The Award: Most Likely To Have Every Single One Of His Facial Expressions Broadcast Throughout Taylor Swift’s Entire Performance
The Winner: Taylor Lautner, Taylor’s ex-bf… not that I had a problem with that. His face, I mean.
The Award: Most Likely To Make You Hate Everything You Ever Wore While You Were Pregnant
The Winner: Amber Rose, whose fiance Wiz Kalifah officially announced the couple’s pregnancy backstage. Amber looked just like I looked during both of my pregnancies!!! …If I had a bomb-ass haircut and a killer dress on every day. Which I totally [in a parallel universe] did. So yeah, it was awk.
The Award: Least Likely To Have Caused You To Sart Screaming Like a Teenaged Twihard Two Years Ago, But Most Likely To Have Incited Some Of Those Screams Last Night
The Winner: Robert Pattinson, for making me realize that my new life as a celebrity/pop culture blogger has changed me in more powerful ways than I’d realized. I was, like, scary excited when he took the stage, lmao! Like, scary…
Okay, and in case you couldn’t quite catch it in the video, The YBF was kind enough to immortalize Chrianna winning the Pinkie for Most Controversial Kiss That Barely Qualifies As A Kiss But Was Still A HUGE Deal:
Lots of other coolness happened and you can check it all out at MTV. What were some of your fave moments from this year’s VMAs?0