While I was on my late-night creep last night (ya know, around 9 pm) I was pleased to see that YBF had posted footage from inside and outside of the W.i.P club where all the Drizzy/Milly/Breezy drama went down. Yes, you can actually see the fight going down in this footage, although you won’t see Drake or Chris Brown throwing any punches (or bottles). Yes, there will be blood in the videos. No, Rick Ross never showed up, as I’d hoped he would. But most importantly, we have a dramatic re-cap from a non-celebrity witness who uses the phrase “shouts-out” (my least favorite variation on “shout-out” or “shout-outs”) more times than I could count. See the footage, blood, and epic recap inside.
According to TMZ, Drake and Chris Brown are both cooperating with authorities. Chris Brown’s lawyers allegedly gave evidence proving Drake’s involvement in the fight. One of the lawyers also named Drake and Meek Mill as the aggressors, but Chris Brown spoke with detectives later and it seems that Drake is not a suspect. Sources told TMZ that the instigator was an ish-talker from Chris’s camp.
Here’s the first vid. The peanut gallery is HEAVY in the buildin’ so just ignore that. They’re nowhere near as insightful as K Mac. But just hold your horses… he’s next.
Around :33 the bloody bodyguard (Big Pat) begins to emerge. You’ll also know he’s coming because the “director” of this “film noir” will promptly shout “That nigga got split!” So, there you go.
(WARNING: HELLA GRAPHIC IMAGES… BLOOD AND OTHER BAD THINGS. FEEL FREE TO SKIP DOWN TO THE NEXT VID)
Here’s the gruesome photo of Big Pat in the hospital. Now I feel bad for calling him the bloody bodyguard. Seriously, this is not okay.
Here is the young Australian woman who PITNBr Krissy told us about yesterday in the comments. TMZ got exclusive pictures of Hollie C. after the fight. Utter ridiculousness.
And finally, the one good thing to come out of all this violence. We get to meet K Mac. Now YBF told their readers to skip past his dialogue if they wanted to get right to the good outside-da-club stuff. They claimed this young man “spent half the video trying to prove to us why he’s too cool for school.” Uhhh, YBF I love you for giving me access this footage but I BEG TO DIFFER. K Mac is a brilliant philosopher of pop culture carnage; a hip-hopportunist with a heart of gold and– dare I say– the first male Feminist. Please watch (no skipping to 2:37 to see Chris, Meek, Trey Songz–yeah he was there–and Drake post-drama), and help me count the “shouts-out.”
I know what you’re thinking. Where the eff was Drake?
Go back to the part that looks like this and you can see him in the shadows to the right of the guy in the owl (OVOXO) sweater?:
5. Most random digression ever:
I don’t even know why Tony Parker was in VIP partying when he just lost to the Spurs. Shouts-out to the Spurs.
4. Best almost-imperceptible diss to Common:
Ya’ll kept saying he (Drake) was scared-a Common! He popped on Chris Brown.
3. Best shouts-out/diss combo platter. Ever:
Shouts-out to Chris, but it’s… everything is coming back to you. You beat on Rihanna, now Drake is beatin’ on you. MMG, Drake, Young Money yup, all-a dem was beatin’ on you. You gon’ have to deal wit it SUCKA.
2. Most surprisingly Feminist moment/message in the history of Hip-Hop beef video footage or in the history of the world:
I’m tired-a ya’ll females, ya’ll stickin up for him (Chris) talkin’ bout, “Oh my God, He still sexy with dat cut on his chin.” ( best WTF face at 1:24) Ya’ll serious? Like, what about him beatin Rihanna? What about her scars? Ya’ll wasn’t sayin she was sexy when she got hit with those scars! Ya’ll all on his balls. Hop OFF…”
1. Best, most succinct use of two highly overused phrases in the rap community:
At the end-a the day, shouts-out to everybody.
Shouts-Out to everybody INDEED. Thank you K Mac.
But seriously, it’s about to go down in a courtroom somewhere. Who do you guys think will end up doing time (if anybody)? I hope it’s not Meek Mill. I don’t want him to be the scapegoat Shyne in this P-Diddy/J-Lo 1999-esque drama in the club. Can you imagine him doing ten years and coming out hella weird and hella Jewish? No thanks. Shouts-out to Meek Mill.0