Je t’aime, Je t’aime, Je t’aime! So why must you and Vogue.French torture me with your beautiful images alongside lovely-looking words I cannot understand (or… um je ne comprend pas)? With each new post you remind me of that gloriously difficult time I spent with the French language– eight intense and invigorating months of verb conjugations that I can barely remember.
And yet, when I’m with you or… er… on you, I am transported back to a time when I totally thought I was kinda fluent in French. In this world of delusion I become Audrey Tautou in Amelie, Marion Cotillard in La Vie En Rose! It’s maddening, it’s delirium, it’s love! Comprenez-vous?
Please, stop sending me subliminal messages about how buying a gabillion dollar Givenchy dress from your galerie– and pulling my hair back just so– would make me look French. C’est impossible! I’d need that crazy awesome lipstick too! And that’s where I’d break the bank; not with the dresses, but with the lipstick.
Still, French Vogue’s Givenchy Gallery (or Galerie du Givenchy… or de Givenchy?), you are perfect. You give me a slideshow without my having asked for it– and the transitions between models are always perfectly timed. How? How do you know the exact number of milliseconds I need to love– not lust– the 2013 Givenchy Resort Collection? Because you know me. And I know you.
Well, I know how to google you (mercy, Style.com). Apparently, your designer Riccardo Tisci looked back to Givenchy himself (and Givenchy’s muse Bettina) to come up with these gypsy-inspired threads. He described them as, “romantic, but with a sharpness.” That is precisely how I would describe my love for you, French Vogue’s Givenchy Gallery. Romantic, because I fall in love again, with each flick of the slideshow. And the sharpness as a result of my growing jealousy of these models in their French-red lipstick (because I’ve decided everything on French Vogue is, somehow, French by association). There’s no way their lips are that plump, I say to myself, sharply.
2013 Givenchy Resort dresses, congratulations on being as fantastically out-of-my-reach as the Anthony Vaccarello pieces in my first open love letter. Thus, I gift you to those who I know would wear you best: Kerry Washington (at the Django Unchained premiere later this year) Frieda Pinto (every day of her life), Miranda Kerr (to her next… anything, in those pant suits) Charlize Theron (to baby Jackson’s next doctor’s appointment… or someplace more practical), Kristen Stewart (along with her Converse kicks) and Chloe Sevigny, who totally has some French-red lipstick lying around somewhere. Damn her.
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