March 26th, 2010
Mar 26, 2010
An original short story published in 'Esquire' magazine
Read: James Franco, ‘Just Before The Black’

James Francofilm star, soap opera actor, Gucci spokesmodel and more — has published a short story titled Just Before the Black in the new issue of Esquire magazine — described as a “story about how it’s only right before you die that you know you’re living” … which you can read online in FULL. Here is part 1 of Franco‘s tale for your reading pleasure:

I sit in the driver’s seat of my grandfather’s old DeVille. It is night out and cool. Me and Joe, we just sit.

We’re out in front of the Palo Alto Municipal Golf Course pro shop. It’s a tan building with white trim. It’s where Joe and I work during the day.

We sit here because it’s dark here, and there are no lights outside this building. We’re stopped for no reason except that the night is still going and we’re drunk, and who wants to go home, ever, and this spot is as good as any to just sit in the shadows and let life slow.

My window is cracked, just a bit, and the air plays on my forehead like a cold whisper.

I often think about driving off the side of freeway overpasses, just plunge Grandpa’s old blue boat through the cement guardrail: The sculpted barrier crumbling about me and Grandpa’s blue machine; a great moment of metallic explosion and heavy ripping and jerking and then release; a soft, slow dive of arcing color through the windshield, into a hard second of impact, just before the black. What an adventure lies behind one quick turn of the steering wheel. A great screaming, and then, slip away.

Joe and I sit and stare at the wall of the building. The building is beige, but the shadows make it shadow-color.

Joe smokes. His window is all the way down, and he breathes his smoke out the black gaping gap.

There is not much to talk about with Joe because he’s such a moron. I don’t know what he thinks he is, or why he thinks he exists. I guess in some lives lived, no one tells you what to be, and so you be nothing. In the olden days you were born into it, all decisions made, and you farmed until you died, or cleaned the royal toilets.

I guess they didn’t have toilets. Just stuck their asses out and shat in the moat. But someone had to wash out the hole.

“If you lived in the olden times, what would you do?” I ask Joe.

Joe has to think about it. He is large, and his weight spreads from his belly across the seat, like it was a plastic sack full of liquid, rolling in layers upon itself.

“Which olden times?” he asks, and it’s like a boar’s grunt, a deep thing, from the thick part of his throat.

“Like, King Arthur, with knights and horses.”

Fatass thinks. I can hear it, rust-worn gears flaking and groaning slowly into motion, even smell it, yellow smoke emanating from his skull.

“I’d be the king,” he says.

“You can’t be the king,” I say. “No one is king. That’s like winning the lottery.”

“If I went back, I’d be king. And I’d fuck every virgin in the kingdom.”

“You can’t be king, asshole. You can’t even be duke. The fact that you even said that shows you’re not royalty. You’re a peasant.”

“Whenever people time-travel, they go back and they are friends with the king, or they are the king.”

“Because those are stories. When people tell stories, they’re always about the king, it’s Aristotle crap. But it’s not real.”

“Neither is time travel.”

The story continues HERE at Esquire‘s site where you can read the entire tale in full. It turns out that Franco is planning the release of his first collection of short stories this October. The collection will be titled Palo Alto and will be published by Scribner (you can preorder the book HERE). It would seem that James Franco has many talents … but do you think writing is one of them? Read the story (or just this excerpt) and let me know what you think. Does Franco have a future in publishing?

[Source]

Greetings
Angelina Jolie & Knox Léon Say Hello To Venice, Italy

Oh man … check out this adorableness … mama Angelina Jolie, who temporarily moved her family to Venice, Italy so that she can film her new movie The Tourist, brought her baby boy Knox Léon out onto the balcony of their palazzo this week so that they could greet the brand new day. As you can see, Knox was feeling very expressive and animated:

Awww … he is so cute. These photos are adorable! I’m so glad that Ange and babydaddy Brad Pitt have finally decided to bring their baby twins out of hiding so that the rest of us can share in their cuteness. This move to Venice has given us unprecedented access to Knox and his twin sister Vivienne Marcheline. I had a feeling we’d be seeing more of the twins during their stay in Venice … hopefully these daily morning appearances on the palazzo balcony will continue. We have a lot of catching up to do with the Brangelina twins.

[Photo credit: Splash News]

Enjoying retirement
Conan O’Brien Pumps Up In SoCal

Conan O’Brien, who will be hittin’ the road on his Legally Prohibited from Being Funny on Television Tour next month, was spotted doing a bit of pumping up here in SoCal this week as he seemingly enjoyed all the new-found free time he’s got these days since losing his gig hosting The Tonight Show. BUT, it wasn’t that Coco was pumping up his muscles to prepare for his upcoming tour, he was actually just pumping gas into his car … but he made it look good:

Wonder if he’s filling his car up with regular redheaded — we mean, regular unleaded… Former Tonight Show host Conan O’Brien wore a big grin on his ginger-bearded face while pumping gas in L.A. on Wednesday. He’s got every reason to be happy, as he recently announced he’ll be hitting the road with his very own comedy tour — that doesn’t involve even a minute of TV on-air time! Although his parting deal with NBC won’t let him show that flame-haired mug on TV any time soon, Coco found a way around that with his series of live performances throughout the U.S., starting in Eugene, Ore. on April 12.

As you may recall, on Wednesday we learned that Conan is close to signing a new Late Night hosting deal with FOX so these lazy days he is currently enjoying may soon become a thing of the past. It’s so nice to see Conan O’Brien lookin’ so happy and well … the man got screwed but manages to find happiness in whatever he does anyway. I am really looking forward to seeing him live in concert next month … yay, Team Coco!!

[Photo credit: Fame; Source]

Faces DUI & child endangerment charges upon his release
David ‘Puck’ Rainey Hospitalized After His Car Accident

On Wednesday we learned that David Puck Rainey, who rose to infamy on MTV‘s The Real World: San Francisco, was injured in a pretty serious car accident this week in the San Diego, CA area. We also learned at the time that Puck‘s 8 year old son was also injured in this car accident. But just a day later, we learned that Puck — still hospitalized — faces serious charges of drunk driving, driving without a license and child endangerment because police have determined that his blood alcohol level was way over the legal limit and was very likely at fault for the accident. Here are photos, courtesy of TMZ, of wrecked Puck smiling for the cameras in his hospital bed this week:

He’s in a real world of hurt — and could possibly be in a real world of legal trouble — but Puck from “The Real World” is still tryin’ to smile … despite the fact that he’s hooked up to a bunch of hospital tubes. Puck is still expected to spend another couple of days at a San Diego hospital following Friday’s horrifying car crash in which he broke several bones … and his 8-year-old son injured multiple internal organs. As soon as he’s healthy enough to leave his bed, Puck will be booked by the CHP for DUI, driving without a license and child endangerment.

I suspect Puck was happy to sell these photos to TMZ in order to raise funds for his upcoming trial. If convicted of driving drunk WITH his 8 year old child in the car with him, I sincerely hope that Puck not only loses the right to endanger his child any further but also that he gets a little jail time to sober him up. It’s extremely hard to feel sorry for someone who gets injured in a car accident due to their own disregard for the law … especially when they endanger the lives of other drivers by driving drunk. BUT, to endanger the life of a child by knowingly driving under the influence while the child is in the car with them? It’s outrageously irresponsible. Anyone who even remotely remembers Puck from his days of reality TV fame knows that he really doesn’t care for authority figures or restrictions … but endangering the life of his child is another thing altogether. I understand Puck‘s son, tho injured, is not in as bad shape as his father … thankfully.

[Source]